Time management is pain management.
I used to think my phone and all those apps were the real cause of my distractions. So, I went ahead and deleted them, figuring that would solve the problem. But then Netflix took over (feels like I have seen every Adam Sandler movie out there). I got rid of that too, only to find myself sinking hours into video games. It was obvious that these things weren’t the main issue.
The problem wasn’t just my devices, it was also something deeper. Distractions come from within, from the uncomfortable feelings we try to avoid. We use distractions to escape discomfort, and that’s what makes them so addictive. Since distractions steal our time, managing our time is really about managing the discomfort we feel. That's why time management is pain management.
But where does this discomfort come from? It’s just part of being human, never feeling completely satisfied. There are four reasons why we’re always looking for more:
1. Boredom: We get restless when things aren’t interesting enough.
2. Negativity bias: Our brains tend to focus more on bad things than good ones. It helped our ancestors stay alert to danger, but now it often makes us dwell on problems.
3. Rumination: We replay negative experiences over and over in our minds, which can make it hard to move on.
4. Hedonic adaptation: The excitement from new achievements or things wears off fast. I’ve seen it myself, whether it’s a new gadget or fancy watch, the thrill fades quickly, and I end up missing the simple things I used to enjoy growing up.
That said, feeling dissatisfied isn’t all bad. It’s pushed us to improve and innovate over time. But if we want to get a handle on distractions, we need to learn to deal with discomfort instead of avoiding it.
The Bhagavad Gita says that someone who can control their mind stays calm no matter what, whether it’s pleasure or pain, praise or criticism. It’s about facing discomfort instead of running from it. Nir Eyal, in Indistractable, echoes the same idea. He talks about understanding our triggers and making peace with discomfort, rather than always trying to dodge it. Real productivity, and good time management, starts with mastering what’s going on inside us.
